During a significant part of our lives, we are pre-occupied with the single most important decision that can make or break us personally – the kind of man or woman to get hitched with.
Marriage or live-in partnerships are not discussed enough in modern society. People tend to think ‘que sera sera, whatever will be, will be’. But this attitude hardly helps. It shows that we don't have the foresight to make the best possible choice while deciding on this all-important question.
I would suggest that one must rely mainly on the gut feeling or instincts to choose the special person to be with, forever. Do consider the following before getting married:
1. Love is the only thing that matters - that special feeling, which makes you happy every time you see the one you love.
2. It is important that you genuinely feel affection and concern for your partner.
3. In case you know that it is an overwhelming sense of lust that you feel, do not go ahead for permanence in the relationship. When the moment of passion is over, you will find yourself thinking – ‘I need to get out of here’.
4. Do you admire your partner’s qualities and achievements? Think whether he or she behaves consistently, lies to you or walks the talk.
5. What are your reasons in looking for a permanent relationship? That you can’t handle your loneliness? Ask yourself, are you on the lookout for social and financial security?
It certainly helps when two people get together for the same reasons. They empathize with each other. So, talk it out.
6. Does your partner have a good sense of humour, even self-deprecating humour? Can he or she make you laugh and lighten the atmosphere even when there is a crisis?
7. Is he or she generally well-behaved, well-mannered, with strong work ethics? Does your partner inspire you, surprise you; does he or she naturally command your trust and respect?
8. Do the two of you have the same basic attitudes about religion, having children, raising children, relating to other family members, close friends, and earning-spending money?
Ponder over these eight golden points very seriously before you embark upon this phase of life. Bon voyage!
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I agree with what scverma says - 'it takes life time to say it was a happy marriage'. Despite these 8 very good points, it requires both partners to make the marriage work. It is very difficult to fathom human mind and people change, you know, so the calculations may not work. But i do agree with Lakshmi and say - go with gut feeling and plunge into it with your eyes open.
Marriages were ones made in heaven now that heaven has come down to earth. With more and more girls being educated they know what they are doing. But caution..love betrays after marriage..Or it does not??. First of fix an age for marriage, child and career. Second, Test your partner frequently for his responsibility, good behavior under difficult circumstances, daily habits and personal hygiene and habits. Marriage is a ceremony to imbibe love with partner and it takes life time to say it was a happy marriage.