Too many teenagers nowadays have access to pornographic sites on the net, and to porn movies and literature. When the search history of the family computer shows up visits to such sites, parents confront their kids, warn and threaten them. The sites are duly blocked with a security system. Also, all the objectionable CDs and magazines are confiscated - this seems to keep the children out of trouble for a week.
A few days later, to their utter frustration, parents discover that the unrelenting adolescents have been visiting other porn sites or buying more of the magazines they were warned about. Now, what should parents do when faced with such a situation?
Firstly, parents must not totally ignore the going-ons or over-react. Confrontations, which are usually the norm, tend to get very ugly. A terribly upset mom raising a hue and cry, and a visibly worried dad doling out physical punishment do not really help.
It calls for an honest and open parent-child discussion to show the child the other side of what he is viewing.
Teenagers are naturally curious about sex and do explore their new-found sexuality. But having said this, they must be made to understand that pornography is not wholly innocent. They must be told that these are very strong and graphic images, which are potentially harmful to sexual development. They must be made to realize that pornography strays beyond normal sex and may involve physical violence.
Parents must explain to their teenager that when he exposes himself to such images at a vulnerable stage in life, he may end up thinking that this is what life is about, which is so totally untrue! He has to be told that in all probability, he may view life through these crass models of degrading attitudes towards women, and exploitative, even hurtful roles in intimate relationships.
When analysed logically in the right perspective, your kids will surely become more thoughtful and sensitive to the rights and wrongs in life. They will not think of pornography as a 'fun' pastime anymore.
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